2016 Purity – Build Your Support Team

by Jeff Fisher on January 22, 2016

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Support, Structure, Strategy and Spiritual Life. Those are the 4 S’s of purity.

I share in my book some great tips and action steps on how to build each of these four areas.  Let me give you a taste of the support chapter. 21-day-kindle-cover

Your support team needs to fill up with three types of people:

  1. General support – people who know a little of your story and still show love, support and God’s grace to you
  2. Specialty support – people who have training & experience to help you zero in on areas that need fixing (counselors, pastors, coaches, lawyers, doctors, etc.)
  3. Drill-down support – people you trust the most and invite to walk with you at the deepest levels (best friends, accountability partners)

Start with your General Support.  Look for people who:

  1. Love you as you are 
  2. Talk about normal life things too
  3. Hang out together with
  4. Have common interests
  5. But go a little deeper

Three Next Steps
1. Get the BOOK – LINK
2. Download the VIDEO TEACHINGS – LINK
3. Allow Jeff to COACH YOU and SUPPORT YOU – www.puritycoaching.com

jeff@puritycoaching.com

2016 Purity – Exercising Your “No” Muscle

by Jeff Fisher on January 20, 2016

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Go to the Purity Gym.  That’s the title of chapter 5 from my book.  It’s about building strength and self-discipline in your purity journey.  If you want to have sexual purity for the long haul, you have to learn to say “No”.
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PRACTICE SAYING “NO” TO UNGODLINESS
Saying “No” flies in the face of the sexual struggler.  As a struggler, you have a long history of doing whatever you want to and pursuing whatever you desire.  You have practiced saying “Yes” to:

  • Indulging your fleshly desires.
  • Going to whatever sites you want to on the Internet.
  • Lusting after anyone you’re attracted to and fantasizing about them.
  • Viewing whatever shows you want on TV and in the movies.
  • Doing whatever you want with your body.

The spirit of God changes everything.  He gives us a newfound ability to say “No” and calls us to a life of self-control.  Here is Paul talking to Titus:

For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age,” Titus 2:11-12

Three Next Steps
1. Get the BOOK – LINK
2. Download the VIDEO TEACHINGS – LINK
3. Allow Jeff to COACH YOU and SUPPORT YOU – www.puritycoaching.com

jeff@puritycoaching.com

2016 Purity – Build Your Internet Defense

by Jeff Fisher on January 18, 2016

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We’re still talking about defense today.  You have to  deal with your Internet and devices if you are going to have a strong sexual purity strategy. 21-day-kindle-cover

INTERNET DEFENSE

Let’s look at several lines of defense for your Internet.  Here are two big ones.

#1:  CONTENT FILTERS – This is the security software that prevents bad stuff from coming in. In practically all computers, you can go to the Internet Settings and adjust the level of security protection, but you really need an extra level of security.  There are many basic content filters available.  Some people like McAfee, Norton, AVG or Kaspersky.  CNET.com is a good place to look a list of options, some of which are free!

Action Step:  Make sure your content filtering is up-to-date and you know how to use it. 

 

#2:  ACCOUNTABILITY FILTERS – I’m a big fan of accountability software.  This is software that tracks all of the sites that the computer goes to and reports them to one or more accountability partners. Accountability software is a wonderful innovation that has helped many men and women to find an openness and freedom in using their devices.

Action Step:  Try out one accountability filtering option. 

Here is a commercial for my favorite solution for Internet defense:

Covenant Eyes – www.covenanteyes.com (Promo Code: PURITY)

Three Next Steps
1. Get the BOOK – LINK
2. Download the VIDEO TEACHINGS – LINK
3. Allow Jeff to COACH YOU and SUPPORT YOU – www.puritycoaching.com

jeff@puritycoaching.com

2016 Purity -Clean House

by Jeff Fisher on January 17, 2016

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An important part of your purity DEFENSE is cleaning house.

Read through this scripture slowly…  21-day-kindle-cover

 

“…let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.”  Hebrews 12:1-2

Throw off… Eliminate… Get rid of….   are you doing this in your life?  You stumble and you fall, in part because you won’t get rid of everything that hinders you.

Make an effort today to do a cleaning run through of your house, work, car, influences.  Consider this tip from my book:

CHECK THE NOUNS
A great purity tip to learn is: Check the Nouns.  You know what a noun is.  It’s a “person, place or thing”.  There are people, places, and things that influence you the wrong way.  You need to eliminate or minimize your contact with them.

Three Next Steps
1. Get the BOOK – LINK
2. Download the VIDEO TEACHINGS – LINK
3. Allow Jeff to COACH YOU and SUPPORT YOU – www.puritycoaching.com

jeff@puritycoaching.com

2016 Purity – Let’s Talk Offense!

by Jeff Fisher on January 5, 2016

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Your Sexual Purity STRATEGY is made up of Defense and Offense.  If you want to know how your purity journey is doing, the defense/offense is a pretty good indicator.  21-day-kindle-cover

 

Defense keeps the bad stuff out (or at least slows it down).  It keeps you from being overrun by triggers, temptations and attacks of the Enemy.  Defense eliminates obstacles to purity, positions roadblocks, and sets up hurdles.  Defense manages the external so that you can focus on the internal.

Offense brings in the good stuff.  It pursues healthy people, places and things.  It makes forward progress.  Offense is actively seeking to heal, grow, build, strengthen, and stretch.  Do whatever you can to “beef up” your offense.

Here are seven areas you can work on that will help you build your offense.  My book elaborates on these areas and gives you some practical tips on how to work each one of them.

SEVEN OFFENSE BUILDERS 

Relationships – Start and Strengthen Them – Build your existing relationships with your friends, your support team and your spouse. Do more with the people you know who are helpful, encouraging, supportive, and loving.  If you don’t have many friends, you need to take some intentional steps to make new friends.  Consider reaching out to church members, small group members, schoolmates, and even family members and neighbors.

Healing – Find People to Help You – Our hearts need God’s healing. We all have been hurt so badly in our past that it led to damage.  Our wounds might be deep anger, disappointment, resentment, negative messages, grief or abuse.  Deeper healing helps us grow stronger on the inside.  You might find facing the pain with a counselor, minister or someone who has found healing from sexual struggles to be therapeutic.Spiritual Life – Feed it – Work on your relationship with God. You need His power to help you.  Schedule Bible reading and prayer time with Him.  Go places that encourage you to learn more about God.  This is where church, small groups, men and women’s ministries and Bible-based conferences can help you in your spiritual growth.

Serve, Volunteer and Mentor – Look for Opportunities – One of the best ways to get your focus off of yourself is to start helping others. You’re not a purity expert yet, but you can share your story.  Your story is powerful and so is your life.  Share your life with others.  Volunteer through your church or a non-profit organization.  When you are giving of yourself and loving, it is impossible to be selfish and consuming.  Reversing the flow from selfish to serving will have a huge effect on your sexual health.

Mind and Heart – Challenge It – Take your mind and heart to places they’ve never been before. Look for a book that will stretch you.  Start writing in a journal or on a blog that will stretch your mind.  Your heart is challenged as you open it to new people and new experiences.  It might mean going on a trip with your kids and doing something special for them.  Maybe participating in a marriage conference is something additional that you and your spouse could consider signing up for.

Faith – Challenge It – What are you doing that requires you to walk by faith? It must be something that is impossible for you in your efforts and resources.  What is impossible for us is possible with God.  Your faith decision might be a giving decision that stretches you.  It might be signing up for a mission trip.  It might be sponsoring a child.  It might be starting a new job.  When we go through life by faith, we are forced to rely on God.  Your faith will be challenged many times as you seek to be sexually pure.  You have to learn to lean on Him for the strength.  What I’m asking you to do is intentionally choose something that will challenge you to depend solely on Him.

Creativity and Passion – Express It. – You are a passionate, creative person. God made you that way.  You have spent a lot of your time, energy, passion, creativity and money on lustful habits.  You need to find healthy places for that energy.  Take up a hobby.  Build something.  Create and innovate.  Learning to steer yourself in healthy directions when you feel like giving into sinful desires is a huge step.  You have to learn to think differently with your creativity.
Three Next Steps
1. Get the BOOK – LINK
2. Download the VIDEO TEACHINGS – LINK
3. Allow Jeff to COACH YOU and SUPPORT YOU – www.puritycoaching.com

jeff@puritycoaching.com

2016 Purity – Let’s Talk Defense

January 4, 2016

Your Sexual Purity STRATEGY is made up of Defense and Offense.  If you want to know how your purity journey is doing, the defense/offense is a pretty good indicator.  We’ll talk about offense later. Here are some basics from my book on Defense.  I break them down more in the book and give you some […]

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21 Days to Purity – Come Out of Isolation

January 1, 2016

Happy New Year!  If you’re like me you are reflecting on the good and bad from 2015.  There were good strides, good memories, and good adventures.  Then there were tough events.  There were areas that were weak in your life.  You didn’t make much progress.Sexual purity can be one of those that is really frustrating.  […]

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2016 A Year of Purity – A New Resource

December 31, 2015

  Make 2016 a year of sexual purity.  You need to make a commitment to your sexual purity journey.  You need to find a way to get serious and stop the cycle of pornography. Here’s a new resource you should try.  The 21-Day Purity Jumpstart by Jeff Fisher. The book will take you on a […]

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9 Sexual Words You Can’t Say in Church

December 30, 2015

I got to thinking about Nine words we should be able to say in church (in the right setting) that would help people with their sexual struggles.

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4 Questions You Need to Answer When Tired, Sick or Emotionally Down

December 29, 2015

My Saturday sexual addiction recovery group was hard today.  I was tired, sick, and emotionally spent.  I came to the group tapped out. Here were some of the things I checked in with the guys that affected me: The Christmas holidays ended. I had an awkward work schedule this week. My youngest son was sick […]

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Sunday Paper – My Strategy For Purity

December 28, 2015

The Sunday Paper can be triggery for me.  The circulars are full of underwear ads and women that are dressed nice, but sexy for me.  The Sports section frequently has ads for men’s clubs… another triggery part of the patper. I also have a long habit of using the ads like soft core pornography.  I wanted […]

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